All set

I just got off my last meeting of today, and it seems like I’ll have two side-projects along with the Master’s thesis. It feels good, but it also occurred to me that I might be overloading myself with work to forget the anniversary of my grandmother’s passing. Still, it has been a good day. I’ve had two dips today where I only want to sink into a couch and be invisible for a little while.

But then I remembered that life will only pass me by if I do so. Yes, grieving is hard, but it’ll fade as this year has proven. It’ll never go away, and I’m very aware that I will carry it with me for the rest of my life. But it’s a comfort that it fades, that way, it’ll leave more space for me to learn new things.

Anyway, my meeting was great. For one of the side-projects, I’ll call them minis from now on, I’ll be working with an invasive algae that produces a slime when they’re disrupted. Very interesting, and it fires me up just knowing it’s invasive. For the other mini, I’ll just be handling data whenever my schedule allows it. I’ll have a 2h introductory meeting whenever people find the time. I get really excited, but now I have to convince myself that I shouldn’t be seeking onto a few more minis for now. I have to learn to settle, or else Zoe will remember me as a superbusy mom that doesn’t pay attention to her. Besides, I’ll be taking two extra classes next year, too. I’m pretty sure I’m insane now, haha.

I want one of these for my future office :)

//c_Cae; if you don’t work for your dream, someone else will hire you to make theirs come true… 



4 responses to “All set

  1. Dear Caely,

    Quite a balancing act you have going on. I’m amazed.

    I can’t believe a year’s gone by since your dear grandmother passed away. Time softens the grieving but it won’t make it go away. I found myself this week, after what would be my dad’s hundredth birthday, straining to remember the sound of his voice and his raucous laughter.

    I applaud your joy of learning and being a mom. I think one day Zoe will be singing your praises. Although I’m sure she does now in her own innocent way.

    Love and Shalom,


    • Dear R,

      Thank you!
      I try not to let the grief weigh me down, life’s so much more than just that (even though I know you’re experiencing the same). I want to remember the good things in life, even when the bad usually teach us more about life itself than anything.

      Live, love, laugh, right?

  2. Dearest Caely,

    That you grieve is proof that your grandmother is there with you, in your love for Zoe, in your zest for life, in your heart….



    • Dear D,

      She runs in my veins. Just knowing so takes me farther than I can ever imagine.


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