I’ve been lazy lately. It started with 2 weeks off my thesis and ended up with 5 weeks of doing mostly nothing. That has resulted in a very exhausted me, because I hate sitting still, I’ve been thinking up all kinds of stuff that I can do. Decorating the apartment was a starter. New couch, new lamp. Yesterday, I dragged a shelf from Lund back home. That was a 3h round trip, for something that normally takes 1h. It’s what happens when I insist of doing things myself. Stupid, I know.
So a little recap of what’s been going on. During the Dutchman’s vacation, we went to Småland to visit friends. I normally have a great time when we’re there, but this time so many things felt off, that it felt kind of awkward to be away. I’ve never been that homesick ever. That passed the second we stepped into our front door. Zoe had a blast, though. We went to this waterpark (overpriced and boring af for adults), and she surprised us by being bolder than ever. She’s normally very cautious over new things, but this time, she dove right in as if water was her second home. Taking after her mom, I think ;)
The following weeks were just me trying to get my streaming overlay done. Yes, I’ve started a stream where I live stream games I play. It’s so much fun, but I feel like my designs need improvement so I put aside a lot of time getting that fixed. I’m close now, and I only need to fix my sound as I can’t hear my games in my earphones. Very important part, because I missed my first donation since my notifications didn’t play in my ears (Indi, if you read this, I’m still sorry I missed you).
The overlay design had me so busy, I completely forgot about my thesis. I jumped right at it again when I realised it’s been so long. The first thing that happens is that none of my programs would start, and when they did, they annoyed me like they did 6 weeks ago. I’m sure I’m doing something wrong, I just have to find it. I thought taking a break would make me see potential mistakes easier, but my mind is still where it left off. I still try to write, as I don’t want to disappoint my supervisor. He’s so patient and competent, it’d be a shame if I didn’t deliver. I know I overachieve, but there are so many people that see so much in me (that I, myself, fail to see), that makes me try harder.
Lately, I’ve been feeling a lot. As in more than usual. I’m a very empathetic person, but I’m not a cryer. Up until recently, I could read sobstories, watch the saddest movies and see sad things without even tearing up. Now I read a little sad piece and I’m all over the place. I don’t know what’s happening, haha. It’s like being in puberty again. And no, I’m not prego :D
Anyway, I’ve caught up to a few shows that I follow, and I still have a few books and stuff to read. Time is not enough right now. I also need to plan a few things for Frank when he comes to visit. I apologise in advance for the following sentence written in caps lock. MY BEST FRIEND FROM LA IS COMING TO VISIT IN SEPTEMBER, OH MY GOD.
Also, Zoe called me her best friend today. Combine that with the exhaustion from yesterday, I am completely incapacitated haha. I spent the first hours of today just lying on the couch, trying to wake up. Maybe it’s 18 months of stress catching up to me. This calls for a bubble bath.
Until next time, be safe <3
//c_Cae; not artistic enough to design an overlay, but it’s still fun